Love Me, Love Me Not Read online

  Way too sexy.

  God, I’m practically drooling.

  “Ready?” Brad asks after the last group boards the elevator.

  I nod. “That was pretty hot,” I say, reaching for his hand since we’re alone.

  “What? Getting everyone to leave?”

  “Yes. And your performance during the game. You are especially…”

  He raises an eyebrow.

  “Sexy tonight.”

  Just then, the elevator dings and the doors open. We enter. As soon as the doors close, his mouth is on mine and his hands grip my butt. “You, too,” he whispers against my mouth. My hands roam down his chest, and I think about going farther, but luckily, I find some shred of self-control. We have like a minute on the elevator, maybe two if we’re lucky. We need to keep this quick and innocent.

  Brad draws me nearer, his body pressed against me, leaving no doubt he’s being honest about finding me sexy as well, and quickly getting out of the realm of innocent.

  My body is torn between doing what’s right and what feels right. I run my hands along his butt. It feels very right, but the gnawing in my gut tells me it’s definitely not right. Not here. Not now. With a deep breath, I take half a step away from him.

  He reaches into his pocket and removes a plastic card. “Do you know what this is?”

  “A key.”

  “A key to my empty room. Carlos decided to bunk with some friends.”

  “Oh.”

  “It’s yours, if you want it. You can stay all night.”

  “An all-night chess tournament,” I murmur. This could be the best opportunity we’ll ever have. I’d be crazy to pass this up, right? It’s almost like a sign we were meant to do this tonight.

  “Only if you want to,” he says. “Do you?”

  Of course I do. It’s just a matter of how bad of an idea it is. How much do I risk losing?

  Only my placement. Which is basically my entire life.

  But that’s only if they found out. Could Sherry find out? She’s like three hours from here. There’s no way she’d know. Gil and Gigi are the bigger problem.

  “I don’t want your parents to kick me out,” I say.

  “They’ll never know. Even if they did, I’d make sure they wouldn’t kick you out.”

  “Promise?”

  “Yes.”

  It’s a terrible idea. I know it is, but I want to do it. I want him. I’ve wanted him for months, and this is the best opportunity we’ll ever have.

  I bite my lip and nod.

  Brad’s brows shoot up at my answer. He definitely wasn’t expecting it. “Do you think Brittany will cover for you?”

  I nod again.

  Handing me the key, he says, “Room 904. In case we’re separated.”

  The elevator stops moving, and Brad steps away, smoothing the front of his shirt and pants. I do the same and take another deep breath.

  As soon as we exit, we can tell where the party is by the deep bass and our rowdy classmates.

  “Party,” he says, motioning to the ballroom, “or chess,” he adds, looking back at the elevator we just exited.

  “Chess can wait,” I say. “We should go to the party. People are here to celebrate you.”

  “No, they’re here to celebrate the win.”

  “Which is largely due to you.”

  His lips spread into a massive ear-to-ear grin, making it clear how much he’s enjoying this. “Okay,” he says, leading me to the ballroom. “Let’s stay for a little while.”

  As soon as we step inside, we see Brittany and Adam, tearing it up on the dance floor. I still don’t understand how they’re not a couple. They’re perfect for each other.

  “This way,” I say, grabbing Brad’s hand and taking him in their direction. They wave to welcome us, and then Brad surprises me by encircling my waist with his arms as he starts swaying his hips. It’s not like Brittany and Adam, but it’s a lot more than we did at homecoming.

  I consider putting a little more space between us, but no one’s paying any attention. Plus, plenty of classmates who are only friends are dancing exactly like this—just look at Adam and Brittany.

  Over the next three hours, we dance, eat pizza, talk, and laugh. It’s awesome. Amazing. The best night of my life.

  The trophy sits on a table at the front of the room and throughout the night, different groups go up and try to get the most outrageous photo with it. My favorite, though, is one of just Brad holding it overhead. He looks so triumphant. I love that look on him.

  Well past one in the morning, we decide to call it a night. Brad heads up first while I talk to Brittany.

  “What’s up?” she asks, wiping sweat from her brow.

  I motion for her to step farther into the corner with me, away from some of our classmates. “I need a favor.”

  “Sure. What?”

  “Um…” I pause, not exactly sure how to put this. I run a few scenarios through my mind, but quickly realize I need to be up front with her.

  “So, Brad and I…”

  She raises an eyebrow.

  “Are … um … kind of … uh … like … dating … secretly.”

  “No shit,” she replies, rolling her eyes.

  My stomach starts churning at her words. If she knows, who else does? “Are we that obvious?”

  She rocks her shoulder into me. “Don’t worry. It’s only obvious to your best friends. I’ve actually been impressed by the act you’ve got going, especially at school.”

  I gulp. “Does Michelle know?”

  She shakes her head. “She’s way too self-centered to put two and two together.”

  I nod, happy to get a little good news. “So, he … uh … invited me to stay in his room tonight.”

  Her eyes grow wide, and her jaw drops.

  “So … um … do you think you could cover for me? Tell Abbie and Michelle I’m staying in the Campbells’ room? And if the Campbells happen to call or stop by, come up with some excuse for where I am?”

  She nods. “I’ve got your back. Have fun tonight,” she says with a wicked smile.

  On my way into the lobby and then the elevator, my feet move a little quicker and I feel a little lighter as I realize how lucky I am to have Brittany. Foster care takes a lot from you—your parents, your school, your friends, your home—but, at least in my case, it also gives a lot. Like a best friend who I’d trust with my life.

  When I get to room 904, I unlock the door and enter in record time, not wanting anyone to see me. Brad is sitting in bed in athletic shorts, no shirt, watching TV, and looking really … sleepy.

  I can’t help but laugh. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I guess I thought it would be more romance and less middle-aged married couple.

  “What are you laughing about?” he asks, turning off the TV.

  I wave my hands, motioning to the entire room. “This. You’re usually a little more…”

  “Southern gentleman?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Sorry. I thought about getting flowers, but the nearest twenty-four-hour grocery store is ten miles away. I did, however,” he says, reaching to the nightstand next to him, “get you chocolate.” He holds out a Snickers bar.

  I walk to the bed and take it from him. “Nothing says romance like Snickers.”

  “That’s what I was thinking. It’s chocolate. Peanuts. Caramel. I pity the guy who has never given his girl a Snickers.”

  I sit down next to him and unwrap the candy bar. After nibbling a piece off, I hold it out to him. He takes a gargantuan bite, leaving me with less than half left.

  “What the heck?” I ask with a laugh, holding it up.

  He reaches into the drawer next to him and pulls out three more. “Sorry, I’m really hungry. It was a tough game.”

  I take another dainty bite and then give him the rest of it to eat. While he’s chewing, I climb over him, into the middle of the bed, and sit with my back against the plush headboard, like he’s doing.

  “So, w
hen do you think you’ll hear from Duke?” I ask, unwrapping the second Snickers.

  His face breaks into a huge grin. “Already got a message from the recruiter.”

  “You’re in?”

  “If I want it.”

  “You do, right?”

  He nods again, but his grin falters. Not much, but enough to make me wonder. “Have you talked to your parents?” I ask.

  “I saw them briefly after the game, but I didn’t tell them about Duke. Have you talked to them?”

  “I checked in with them when I got back to the hotel, like they asked. That’s all.”

  “Was that their only rule for tonight?”

  “No, I also had to stay in the hotel all night and not drink or do drugs.”

  “They didn’t mention sex?”

  “No.”

  “Really?”

  I nod. “I guess they figured there wasn’t much risk of it tonight.”

  “Is that why you’re so willing to play chess all of a sudden?”

  I smile. I hadn’t considered that, but I guess it could play a role. With a shrug, I say, “Maybe,” although I think the bigger reason is my crumbling self-control.

  “Well, you really won’t be breaking any of their rules, so you don’t have to worry about getting kicked out.”

  “Except the unspoken rule of not hooking up with your foster brother.”

  “Unspoken doesn’t count. If they expect you to follow a rule, they need to tell you.”

  Of course he would say that, being Mr. Semantics and all. “You’re always a stickler for the finer points of rules. Maybe you should be a lawyer instead of a psychiatrist.” I hand him the candy bar, and he takes a more normal-sized bite.

  “Do you have anything I can wear for pajamas?” I ask. “I left all my clothes in my real room.”

  He slides out of bed and rummages through a large duffel bag. After only a few seconds, he shakes his head. “Nope. Nothing. You’ll have to go full-blown commando.”

  “Only if you do,” I say, joking.

  Except he reaches down, hooking his thumbs into his shorts.

  “Wait!” I say, raising my hands. “I’ve got caramel stuck in my teeth, confetti stuck in my hair, and sweat covering every part of me. I need to get cleaned up before we do the whole naked thing for the first time.”

  He holds his hand out toward the bathroom. “By all means. I’ll just be waiting here for the naked chess to commence.”

  I go into the bathroom and start with a quick shower. I plan on using the fruity sample-sized shampoo and conditioner, but I’ll have to use the entire bottle of conditioner to get the tangles out of my hair. Why do they make these bottles so small? Would it kill them to give you at least two uses out of each one?

  I wrap a towel around me and lean out the door. “Hey, Brad?”

  “Yes?”

  “Are you going to need any conditioner in the morning?”

  “What’s conditioner?”

  “For your hair.”

  He gives me a blank stare.

  “To get the tangles out.”

  He smiles. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a tangle.”

  “Really?”

  He laughs. “Really. Why are you asking me this?”

  “Can I use the whole thing?” I ask, holding up the bottle for him to see.

  “Knock yourself out.”

  I climb back into the shower. When I’m done, I try running my fingers through my wet hair, but I really need a brush to get it looking more manageable.

  “Hey, Brad?” I ask, leaning through the door again.

  “Yes?”

  “Do you have a brush?”

  “No.”

  “A comb?”

  “I don’t know. Look through my bag.”

  I poke through the mesh pocket area but don’t see one. There’s another pocket, one that’s zipped and not see-through. I unzip it and move things around with my fingertip as though the less I disturb them, the less snoopy I’m being. Luckily, I find a comb resting against the back of the pouch.

  After combing my hair, I decide to focus on my teeth. Brad has both toothpaste and mouthwash sitting on the edge of the sink.

  “Hey, Brad?” I ask, leaning back into the room again.

  “Yes?”

  “Can I use some of your toothpaste and mouthwash?”

  “Yes. My toothbrush is in there, too.”

  I wrinkle my nose. “I’m not using your toothbrush.”

  “Why not?”

  “That’s disgusting.”

  He laughs at me. “You think my mouth is disgusting? After all the times you’ve kissed me?”

  “No, but … toothbrushes are personal. Like your dad said, we need boundaries.”

  “Got it. Swapping spit and other stuff okay; swapping toothbrushes not okay.”

  “Yes,” I say with a nod. “That’s a deal breaker for me. If you ever use my toothbrush, I’ll have to go all ninja-Hailey on you.”

  “I’d like to see that.”

  I smile and retreat to the bathroom, where I put a little toothpaste on my finger and scrub the best I can. While scrubbing, I get a peek of a green foil wrapper sticking out of Brad’s bag. I move closer to get a better look and see a mountain of them inside the pouch.

  “Hey, Brad?” I ask, leaning out the door again, this time with a mouth full of toothpaste.

  “Yeah?”

  “Why do you have like twenty condoms in here? Do you have plans I should know about?”

  “Nope. That’s my full supply. I thought it was less likely Mom would look in there than under my sink or in my nightstand.”

  “So, there’s not a line of girls outside waiting to come in here?”

  “Very funny.”

  I lean back in and spit into the sink.

  “Hey, Hailey?”

  “Yeah,” I reply, looking at myself in the mirror.

  “Are you nervous?”

  I pause. Am I? Why would I be nervous? I’ve done this before; it’s not like it’s my first time. “Why?” I ask.

  “You’re talking an awful lot for such a quiet person.”

  He’s right. I’m never this chatty. God, I am nervous. It’s only been a couple months. It’s not like I’ll have forgotten everything. Plus, he’s only done it once. He’s probably doesn’t have superhigh expectations.

  Of course, all my experience is with Chase. Brad is nothing like him.

  “Are you nervous?” I ask.

  “A little.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah. Things are going well. I don’t want to ruin it.”

  I step out of the bathroom in my towel. “Are you naked yet?”

  He throws back the blanket to show me his athletic shorts. Then he picks up a T-shirt lying on the bed and tosses it to me. “Maybe we should wait.”

  I grab the shirt out of the air, then hold it against my chest. “We may never have this perfect of an opportunity again.”

  “You forget we’ll be in college with college dorm rooms in no time.”

  “You’ll be in Durham, and I’ll be who-knows-where.”

  “You’ll come visit me.”

  I walk around the bed and sit down next to him. “If I’m lucky enough to get into college, I probably won’t have a car.”

  “Then I’ll visit you.”

  “You’ll be playing football. Are you really going to have time for that?”

  He shakes his head.

  I stand and pad back to the bathroom, where I rinse my mouth and change into his extra-large T-shirt, which hangs to my knees. Then I crawl into bed next to him, wrapping my arms around his chest as he stares at the ceiling.

  I suddenly feel bad for bringing us down tonight. This had been an awesome day until three minutes ago. I know we need to talk about next year, but not right now. Tonight, we should just enjoy the time we have alone.

  “I’m sorry,” I say, laying light kisses on his neck, determined to salvage what’s left of the night. “Let’s h
ave fun. I’m in the mood for some serious making out.”

  “Checkers?”

  I nod. “Naked checkers.”

  With that, he flips off the light, and we finally get to enjoy each other without the constant worry of someone finding us and kicking me out.

  CHAPTER 26

  With a good stretch of my legs and a yawn, I open my eyes. Sunlight streams in from the window, basking the room in a warm orange glow and making me wonder how late it is.

  “Good morning,” Brad says from beside me. I turn my head. He’s lying on his side, watching me.

  “Good morning. How long have you been up?”

  “About half an hour.”

  “Have you been sitting there, staring at me the whole time?”

  “Would it be creepy or sweet if I said yes?”

  “Creepy.”

  “Then, no. Definitely not.”

  I laugh and pull his arm around my waist. The last thing I remember before falling asleep was being curled up against him, completely surrounded by his warmth with his heart beating against my back. There was a sense of safety and calm I’ve never felt before. It was like I had finally found where I belong.

  “What were you really doing?” I ask, snuggling into his chest.

  He tilts his head toward the phone lying on the nightstand. “Reading about the game … and watching you.”

  I smile at his words. It doesn’t seem nearly as creepy if he was also doing something else. “What’d they say about the game?”

  “We made an incredible comeback and won against impossible odds because of the underappreciated but extraordinary talent of a certain player.”

  “A certain quarterback?”

  He smiles.

  “Feel free to gloat. You deserve it.”

  Tightening his arm around my waist, he pulls me even closer. “I’d prefer a replay of last night,” he whispers, his mouth at my neck.

  We didn’t play chess last night, but what we did was a thousand times better than anything I ever did with Chase. “What time is it?”

  “Nine. The bus isn’t leaving until ten thirty. I’m supposed to have breakfast with the team at nine thirty, but I can skip it.”